AGYAT

I and The boatman

2007-06-07T22:09:00.000+05:30

To continue with my journey, I needed a boat to cross the river. Although, I knew I can swim, but there was a fear to get drowned. Therefore, I kept looking for a boat. My luck was with me, as I found a boatman nearby. I get into his boat and crossed the river, giving a penny in return which he accepted, humbly. I went along with my journey leaving both the boat and the boatman behind!

'What a pity?', I thought about the boatman. Though he had a boat of his own, he is stuck in the middle, not taking the path which I was seeking. I smiled at his foolishness and went along my way.

Further down the path I was again in front of a river looking for a boat to help me out. To my astonishment, I found the same boatman with another boat. Puzzled, I sat in his boat, crossed the river and then asked how he could be here when I saw him before! He smiled at my curiosity and said calmly, 'Further down the path, there is another river, and you will find me there as well.'

Sannyaas

2006-11-25T11:06:00.000+05:30

In my view, Sannyaas cannot have different forms. No adjectives can be used before this word. I will try to explain, although I am not sure whether Sannyaas can be explained in words. It is an understanding and without this understanding, you may call yourself a Sannyaasi, yet it may just remain a label to identify you for others.

Sannyaas is the last stage of life among the four stages of life which was followed in vedic period. From the very beginning of your life, you have got attached with this world through your mind. More specifically, your mindspace. Sannyaas is the stage, in which you understand those attachments and prepare yourself for the last stage of your journey (life). Therefore, renunciating your social relations, your home, your family, your identity etc. It takes you towards your 'self' and further towards the emptiness or the unknown from where you have started your journey (life). So, Sannyaas is the journey of your mind towards 'self' (not 'myself'. This 'my' is the very first attachment which you have associated with the 'self' in you).

Note: Understand this in the light of body-mind-spirit concept. Here 'self' is you in pure spiritual form i.e. without the sense of 'my body' and 'my mind'. You can never say 'my spirit' and hence, no 'my' self.

When the mind gets that understanding, the renunciation, is the by-product. In other words, when your mind understand Sannyaas, you renounce your attachments, rather than by renouncing your attachments you become a Sannyaasi! A 'Sannyaasi' can never say - 'I am a Sannyaasi'. The term is used by others for reference and that is for their convenience.

Agree or disgree, most of the people go through the four stages of the life -
first as a student (dependent on his father)second after marriage (self dependent or dependent on his father)third as a father (self dependent or dependent on his son)fourth as a useless fellow (either within a family or thrown to an old age home)

When a father understands that his son is able enough to take the responsibility of his family, he disowns him and starts his journey towards Sannyaas - the last stage of his life.

When a student or disciple (bramhachari), understands the complete meaning of the journey which is called life and decides not to be a Grihastha, he starts his journey towards Sannyaas. (This is a short-cut, bypassing 2nd and 3rd stages of life. He is the 'escapist', not taking the responsibilities of a married life).

When a student or disciple, after learning from his Guru, develops his own 'understanding', he is totally disowned by his Guru and has to take a decision whether to be a Grihastha or a Sannyaasi.

When a student or disciple, after learning, develops and establishes Dharma (within himself), he has to detach himself from all the means by which he has attained it. Dharma provides him the capacity to take his own decisions. Even Buddha has said - 'Buddham saranam gachhami, Dhammam saranam gachhami' - first come to Buddha's shelter and after learning, Dharma will give you shelter. It is not that you need to follow your Guru all your life. You need to follow him till you understand Dharma and start following it.

Dharma is the ability of mind by virtue of which it takes right decision before any action.

The goal of every religion is to develop this ability into the minds of its follower. And when one develops this ability, he becomes independent of religion.

Reason for those detachments - He might develop the sense of 'my belief', 'my faith', 'my guru', 'my religion', 'my sannyaas' etc. - causes for the ego. Detachments or renunciation does not necessarily mean leaving your family, society, religion etc. and going to himalayas. It means renouncing the very 'my' attached to these things from your mind.

Can you fight without associating 'my' to something?Think of any form of fight, battle or war!!!Could Hitler have gone for the War, without having this 'my' within himself? He wanted to call the entire world as 'my world'?

In the Indian caste system, the lowest of the lower castes is that of a bhangi. Do you know what is his duty? He takes the burden of cleaning the society, otherwise the people will rot and die in their own dirt. He does not have any kind of ego within him. He cannot perform his duty, without winning over the hatred within him for the dirt. Those who are on the path of 'Sannyaas' do something similar to that. Only, difference is that they try to clean the 'mindspace' of the society. Buddha, Vivekananda and Gandhi are very few 'known' examples. Those who succeed in this path, do their work and simply vanish!

Looking inward

2006-11-16T20:06:00.000+05:30

When an apple fell from a tree, a scientist asked - 'Why this apple fell on the earth?' Therefore, the quest to know the external world. But, a yogi asked - 'Who is observing this apple which fell on the earth?' and, the quest to the internal world begins.

The yogi closes his eyes and contemplates about seeing/observing the external world (the event of apple falling from the tree). Therefore, the realisation that eyes are just one of the senses which connects the outer and inner worlds. In the absence of any connection to the external world through various senses, there is still something lingering in the mind. It is the thought about the external world (the event of the apple falling from the tree). Now, the observation has shifted from the external event to the internal world where the thought still holds about what is external. There is an observation of the chain of thoughts playing around in the mind, which has been triggered by an external event!

With the observation of thoughts, the focus of the mind shifts to this internal world. There is a continuous chain of thoughts about the thought itself! All the external events and the objects are gone. But, still the chain of thoughts continues. Who is thinking? Who is observing? But, why this who? Just stop thinking and in this silence of mind, there is something which remains.... There is a feeling of that something present, apart from the body and those thoughts!

By observing one's thoughts, it is found that thoughts themselves are dualistic. As soon as, the answer to the question - Who is thinking or observing? - is found and identified, the other aspect automatically gets into the picture. There is someone who is saying and someone who is listening. The observer and the observed! But, as soon as the thought disappears, the observer and the observed ceases to exists. There is simply a state of observing! This state of observing, brings a realisation that thoughts are nothing but manifestations of something which is there. That which is responsible for thoughts to be generated. Something which appears nothing to this mind. It is pure awareness, when consciousness of mind is transcended to the level of no thought. When all appearances and observations from the senses ceases to exist.

The observer

2006-10-28T20:24:00.000+05:30

After negating all the connections to the external world through the senses and all the thoughts which are playing around in the mind, there is something which remains within. In the silence of mind, there is something which makes its presence felt. It is silently watching or observing from within. Even while I am writing this, I can very vividly feel that something observing from within. It is like I am being watched by someone looking over my shoulder. I can very much assure myself that this very observation goes on in everyone present in this world. For each of us, there is one and only one observer sitting inside and watching our all actions, both physical and mental from within. But, when the mind is completely out of this picture with no thoughts playing around, I feel myself as observing the observer. I am face to face with the unknown...

The Oneness

2006-10-22T16:02:00.000+05:30

This might be very difficult to put into words, but I do have no alternative. Yes, this 'I' does not and cannot have any alternative. 'I' can only be singular and it is always alone. Every mind has exactly the same experience of 'I'. 'I' as experienced by me is same as experienced by you. It is like the experience of being present in this world. Being now and here, without any straying thought in the mind. The darkness can never appear differently. The sound of silence can never be distinct. The feel of emptiness or nothingness can never be separate! How can the experience of divinity be different?

The loneliness

2006-08-06T13:01:00.000+05:30

Agyat makes me feel lonely. It brings a feeling of exclusivity from the entire world. It disassociate myself from the external world. The world seems deliberately created for me to live in. To entangle or indulge myself in different physical and mental activities. Sometime when I close my eyes and look within, the depth simply absorbs me in itself. I loose my identity. I simply, feel like being nothing. Its like a dream which is completely blank. There is no pictures, no thoughts and thus, no emotions. Its completely dark in there. Initially, when I was unfamiliar with this experience, there were fear. Fear of being separated from my world. May be, this is what is known as 'the fear of unknown'. But with time, understanding the attachments and associations with the world, the fear slowly gave away to a new association to this loneliness. Now, I feel like being a part of this eternal peace!

An interface

2006-08-01T22:47:00.000+05:30

I feel like being as an interface to the world for Agyat. It watches the entire world through me. I enteract with different things, people and have to deal with different situations in my life. Yet, it is silently sitting inside watching my life and the world around me. Sometime in my loneliness, when I am cut off completely from the outside world, I feel its presence the most. It serves as an interface for me to that dark, unknown emptiness. That unlimited expanse of silence. A dream where nothing appears, not even a thought. I feel this eternity as my source, from where I have come to this world and become known to the people around me. But, the interface to the unknown still lies within.

Introduction

2006-07-29T16:49:00.000+05:30

This is about Agyat. It is someone within me, who have haunted me from the very beginning of my life. The unknown who has been sitting within silently watching from inside. It has been the greatest mystery which I had to face and I know it will remain as it has been all along with me. You might be confused with this kind of introduction, but believe me he is like that only, without any attributes. A dark emptiness without any face or any characteristics. Whenever I am alone, it appear and make its presence felt. It is difficult to introduce something which is there but you do not have anything to explain about.

Its presence makes me feel as if I am at the centre of this entire creation. This whole creation has been created for me.